Photo by me'nthedogs

When you begin to touch your heart or let your heart be touched, you begin to discover that it’s bottomless, that it doesn’t have any resolution, that this heart is huge, vast, and limitless. You begin to discover how much warmth and gentleness is there, as well as how much space. -Pema Chodron

As a high school math teacher, my husband frequently writes college recommendations. At the top of each letter, he types five bold-faced words that describe his best and brightest. These are the snapshots, the power words, the reasons why a university should say yes: intellectual, driven, intuitive, motivated, mature, compassionate, reflective. All admirable traits.

But I think there are a few missing. He’s never written kind or caring, perhaps because they sound too commonplace, too ordinary. He’s never written warm or gentle either. But it’s not because he’s never taught students who embody these qualities. He just doesn’t recognize them as powerful enough or believe them to be highly valued by a college admission’s office. Does warm qualify you as worthy college material? How is someone with gentleness a good investment in a university’s future? 

The irony of this is that many people have told me that my toddler is sweet. And naturally, I say thank you and smile, but inside I’m beaming. To have a child whose heart is full, whose manner is mild, whose very being exudes warmth and kindness. As a parent, I couldn’t wish for more. And I hope that this feeling is never overshadowed by a the pressure to define oneself by the power words. Let sweet be enough.  For me, gentleness has power- maybe not the power to move money, but the power to move human beings. 

Nothing is so strong as gentleness, nothing so gentle as real strength. -Saint Frances de Sales

**This post is part of the Moms’ 30-Minute Blog Challenge at Steady Mom**